Pink is the new Black

Watched Harry Potter last Thursday 120707 and despite garnering lukewarm reviews for itself, I thought that the movie was rather nice. Granted that the crowd was overtly enthusiastic; screaming, clapping, whistling and chanting in unison, I enjoyed the film tremendously.

Evil is swathed in the most hideous shade of colour for this movie, poisonous pink. Dolores Umbridge is wonderfully played by Imelda Staunton. She is the amalgamation of all our worst school teachers, a chronically strict and arrogant instructor who seeks only to carry out the ministry’s fullest intention in suppressing and denying the news of the resurgence of Lord Voldermort (wonder if I’m tagged? Eww…so geeky). The despicable, petty government functionary masks her prejudice and sadism in blinkered loyalty to her irrationally paranoid boss Cornelius Fudge. Her acting was subtly nuanced; nonchalantly sipping tea, savoring every ounce of exquisite agony derived from executing medieval methods of torture on her students. Her words are gilded with sarcasm and speeches filled with poisonous accusatory insinuations. She seems to echo my junior college principle in the way she pronounces her cruel diktats with a passive-aggressive feminine sweetness. The insincerity and artificialness of her dull but precisely memorized speeches clearly articulates the sinister intentions of the ministry and is similar to how they choose to instill “loyalty” back at ACJC. Her annoying silvery throat-clearing cough which she uses so rudely to interrupt everybody whenever she hears or sees something she violently disagrees with is exactly how I imagined it when I was reading the book. Pink and perky, she soon becomes the students' nightmare: a cheery commissar whose smile gradually fades away revealing a face of cruel malignity with a mouth contorted into an otherworldly rictus.

You may be wondering why I am talking so much about Umbridge. Well that’s because she has been allowed to dominate the screen time for far too long, proving to be a great distraction to the story. Because of the lack of judicial distribution of screen time (although Alex would disagree and tell you that everybody has precisely 15 minutes...pffth TJC always has to be right...anyways), this series continues in it’s unwavering tradition of endorsing a shocking waste of talent which includes Maggie Smith (Minerva MacGonagall), Emma Thompson (Sybil Trelawney); both of whom I simply adore and Julia Walters (Mrs. Weasley) just to name but a few. However the thespians truly owned the small snippets of screen time which they share with their younger co-stars. It’s nice to see Alan Rickman (Severus Snape) in a more active role other than his watered-down camos of forcing Harry and Ron to study.

I’m glad that Emma Watson (Hermione Granger) has taken heed to what critics have been lamenting about for the past 4 films. To say that she’s overly melodramatic is stating the obvious. Only she has been so oblivious to the alarming fact of her deplorable acting and blatantly ignores the overwhelming responses to that. Darling there’s more to acting than frowning and it’s a movie not a soap opera so spare us your theatrics. With that said Evanna Lynch (Luna Lovegood) is a breath of fresh air. No more Little Miss confused a.k.a. Hermione hogging the silver screen thank god. And I know I’ll be saying this for the umpteenth time but I simply love her eyes. So pretty.

There are many out there bemoaning the fact that her longest book having being reduced into the shortest film yet produced sacrifices too much narrative for effects. But then again by consensus it's not really her best work. I don’t see how this should hinder us from enjoying the movie. The stark difference between watching and reading is that a movie manages to capture a scene what a book tries to achieve in many words. J. K. Rowling’s strengths are her arresting narrative and vivid description of characters which I think was well captured in the movie. The intensely breath taking magic duels in the cavernous blacked tiled Ministry of Magic, the clandestine and illicit “army” spearheaded by Harry and the broom rides through London is simply magic. Although I wish they had taken more time to introduce the newer characters instead of just flooding us with so many new faces. I mean I don’t even know who they are until I see the credits and these are people who are going to reappear in the later books.

Oh dear i just realised that my blog's pink haha.

Ring any bells? An all too familiar sight haha

Movie Love

Went out for a movie this past weekend with Alex and Dennis. It was more of an impulse really. Woke up that Friday morning and felt that I needed a decent movie to set my systems straight. It has been bugging me for weeks. With the deluge of blockbusters cascading in within this small frame of time, vying to see who could chalk up the most revenue and be crowned this summer's biggest hit, I’m pressurized to get out of my solitude and watch at least one lest I’m all left out and having to resort to lousy conversational topics like “guess who I did a proctoscopy for the other day.” And since my parents and brother have collectively chosen to abandon me and watch the shows on their own I haven’t had a choice but to drag myself out from my house and tear myself away from my organ. So much for family outings. Pffth!

I knew I wanted to watch "Priceless" since it’s a scintillating tale of how to snag yourself a rich person. The art of seduction is international so I shouldn’t be deterred that it’s a French film. This could well be an alternative lifestyle for me haha. Reminders to self, never sit the front row because it really hurts and unless the show is truly spectacular it simply isn’t worth.

Imagine enjoying the high life with somebody eagerly picking up the tab for up. Splurging on the most extravagant and useless of stuff, such as an ornate glided Faberge egg or exquisite august chandeliers without feeling abashed. All you need to do is just to march into any boutique shop, point wilfully in the general direction and the object of choice would be sitting at your home ready for you to chuck it aside with gay abandon. Relaxing at a café, sipping a bubbly glass of champagne and inhaling a long drag of smoke whilst enjoying the languor of a hot afternoon is simply too decadent. Leading a life of luxury and indolence is clearly the way to go for me at least haha. I guess it’s because I’m quite the thrifty in real life that’s why I have this perverse craving to spend money careless and without inhibition. No more "Travel & Living" for me. Hell truly has a place for people like me haha.

Going on flights of fancy, and in this case it’s not just dreaming up the wildest most luxurious holidays. I literally mean going on vacations as and when you desire. Want to indulge in authentic French haute cuisine? Chuck all worries aside and check yourself into the Jules Verne restaurant on the Eiffel tower and by pass the 4 month reservation. Want to be amazed by egg and bacon ice cream or oyster and passion fruit jelly? Then be seated at the Fat Duck and be impressed by the infinite wonders of molecular gastronomy. Can’t tolerate the bitter winters of New York? Well retreat to your personal island in the Bahamas or the French Polynesia and enjoy the euphoric solitude. Be deliciously sun-kissed or swim in the pristine waters as the vast expanse of the turquoise sea meets the azure sky. There’s no need for luggage. All the clothing would be bought there and then. Wear and throw. It’s as simply as that. The sheer luxury and indulgence is making me slightly delirious. The only thing that could probably elicit a similar emotion would be watching Pierre Cochereau improvise a scherzo that’s so full of rhythmic vitality in the vast expanse of the Notre Dame Cathedral or Tournemire, the colourist, coaxing the organ into singing a Gregorian chant that’s infused with his unique brand of intoxicating harmonies or even Marcel Dupre improvising a six voice double fugue. Of course I’m no fashiophile so I’ll be relatively cheap to maintain. Anybody interested? ;)

And the tips were quite common sense but I don’t know how much of it really works. Such as using half-finished sentences which simply drives the other party wild with curiosity and leaving them so eager to please. It allows you to be in full control of the situation and you have them at your beck and call. But this method seems to be really short-lived and doesn’t bear repetition. I got so scared for the main actor Jean, here played by Gad Elmaleh, when his sugar-mommy expressed her anger at him trying to play the field and told him to stop abusing the part of the blushing virgin.

Flirt using the technique you developed when you were 15. Be whimsically charming. Adopt a genial approach towards everybody. Consider all possibilities.

Use the distant but intently hearing look. Audrey’s performance is so wonderfully nuanced and subtle that it just whets your appetite for more.

Audrey was so convincing at the beginning as a shamelessly materialistic slut that you would enjoy slapping her without feeling remorse. Her insatiable appetite for the rich and famous makes you want to decry her as Jezebel, especially in the scene where she’s desperate and frantically scrabbles through her phone book trying very earnestly to hook up again. How she makes her way through parties targeting and isolating unsuspecting individuals like a hyena on the prowl, giving everybody lascivious winks whilst being clad in impressive designer brands, albeit dressing quite provocatively and ostentatiously. To see her take advantage of a man who’s so smitten with her makes you wanna scream injustice. But she slowly transforms into this lovable character and she redeems herself eventually as she realises what she’s jeopardizing and learning to appreciate what she has. This would be the fifth movie of her that I’m watching. Most recently would be "A Very Long Engagement". I vividly remember because that was my first M-18 show, and I cried eyes out during that one. I was reduced to a sniffling fool at the end of the show, so choked up on my tears and mucus. That show completely floored me.

Nudity helps in the unravelling and appreciation of the plot as far as this movie is concerned. What’s more it’s tastefully done. It’s not like porn which I assume to be grotesquely distorted and shamefully paraded. Everything is so tender, intimate and purposeful, nothing loud or vulgar. It’s love making not mindless sex. Alex apparently was quite excited that there was brief nudity but I didn’t I caught anything that’s outrageously brazen. In fact I think there were more scenes in “A Very Long Engagement”.

I must say this is a great break away from the Hollywood brand of romantic comedies and I’m relieved that such films still exist. Forget your klutzy Lindsay Lohan and the mind-numbingly boring plot-less teen chick flicks. It’s different because the lead actress is for once not trying to prove her worth and does things to get the guy’s attention. This is about a guy who loves a woman in spite of her flaws. This truly is what I would brand as “movie love”. I think Audrey's line differentiating charisma and looks is well worth quoting. Looks can't stand the test of time and is subjected to your whim and fancy but charisma exerts a greater sway on the person. It mesmerises instead of just commanding the immediate but short lived attention that looks promises.

I’ve just been introduced to Gad and truthfully I wasn’t really looking forward to seeing him in it because he was quite an insipid young man, his features too pointedly brought together to be instantly attractive for a romantic role such as this. He lacks the suave and sophistication of let’s say Richard Gear in Pretty Woman or like the stylish, debonair Pierce Brosnan in James Bond. However he exudes this innocence that’s so charming and appealing. You would think who in the right frame of mind would allow themselves to be manipulated by a woman whose sole purpose is to drain your reserves dry as she goes on her ravenous shopping sprees all in an attempt to bankrupt you. You could be expostulating that he’s such a wimp for allowing himself to be dictated by the woman but then you realise that he truly loves her and sincerely believes that things would work out for the better. How he sacrificed everything for her. His job, his innocence and his “security” that his rich lover promises. He’s so naïve that you could hardly bear to reprimand him. Love truly is patient and kind. Eventually he manages to insinuate his way into her affection and that's what counts.

Many think that we’re all pursing a forlorn hope of finding “movie love” Others think that “movie love” is a pernicious lie but I would love to experience it even just once. Recollecting the movie has left me feeling all fuzzy inside.

Cheers to a great movie and company. All smiles.